To err is human. To loaf is Parisian.

I'm sorry...Paris Hilton just gets more and more ridiculous every day. So, y'know how she is dating Nicole Richie's baby-daddy's twin bro? (Ya still with me?) Well, that alone is creepy enough, but that's not all. Paris is constantly wearing the brothers' new clothing line (more on that later)--the hoodie, the ring, the necklace, blah, blah, blah--so she is basically just a whore. Maybe he hired her as a spokesmodel and they're not really dating--you heard it here first! Anyway, at his birthday party over the weekend in (where else?) Vegas, she got a GINOURMOUS cake that read "Happy Birthday, Benji. LOVE, PARIS!" Oh, snap, she basically just made IT. ALL. ABOUT. PARIS. The cake couldn't have just said "Happy Birthday, Benji." Nah! She needed everyone to know that they are an item and that the cake was from her (how could it not be--it was the tackiest thing in the room). Ew. You can have him, "The P that's Not Me," I'll take the Paris Latsis' and the Stavros Niarchos' of the world!

So, the thing about the new clothing line. KB forwarded an email last week that was announcing the new line from the Madden Brothers. According to either Dumb or Dumber, they named it DCMA to honor their DC and Maryland heritage. Um, hi! MA is MASS-A-CHU-SETTS; MD is MAR-Y-LAND, and growing up in Waldorf, MARYLAND, is NOT growing up in DC. Sorry, boys; same as the Baltimorons, y'aren't from DC. One more thing, DCMA also stands for the Defense Contract Management Agency. Ya don't want that to be the first thing that comes up when someone Googles your clothing line. If only they'd known that Maryland is MD, the first thing that woulda come up when one Googled their line is a company offering independent financial solutions for vehicle management. Woot!

My coworkers and I saw Paris twice during this last trip to Vegas. Just as she did in August, she walked by our booth on the way to and from the Dollhouse booth; they produce "her" denim line, so she graces them with her presence for 2 hours, texting constantly while checking her reflection in the mirror, occasionally acknowledging the buyers who expect her to know at least SOMETHING about the new line. The photo there is of her at the August tradeshow looking mizzerable. Let's say it in French, shall we: mizz-air-ah-bluh! Love it! KG, LG, and I have far too much fun to ever look like that at the show!! By the way, I Googled Paris' denim line so I could have good Webiquette and link to it, but all roads led to NO WHERE! HA! It isn't even for sale at Kitson anymore. Ha ha ha ha. How cute.

Oh, when she walked by our booth on her way into "work" this time, she was on her cell, pretending, I'm sure, to talk to someone just so she looked busy. The second time she walked by, on her way out of the gig and on her way to making an ARSE outta herself at LAX, she looked right at me. From a foot away. I looked right in her dilated pupils and said "Hey, Bitches." Ha! Anyway, a friend of mine and Kurt's was there at the Luxor when it all went down...until I get him to transpose his recollection of that night's events, I'll just say that she pulled another one of those drunken 3 minute mumblings on the mic--where the F*&# is her publicist?? That was the 2nd time in a week that she made ass outta herself by grabbin' the mic at a club when she was WASTED. Either the girl knows how to look hot even when she is wasted or these are before she had a few bumps in the loo-- you decide.

BTW, All this blogging and Facebooking is making my nails HAWT! They're growin' like Mother Fuckahs. ;) Wow, as I get older, and I am getting older, I am starting to notice how my hands look so much like my Grandma's. Grandma Martha. She and I were soul mates. For good and for bad, I inherited a lot of G'ma Martha's "stuff." The physical resemblances are found in my hands, the "eleven" between my eyes, my height, and my curly locks; the emotional similarities...well, that's another post, another time...

xoxo,
MPL