maybe it was a sign...

...of what a dumb-ass kris humphries is when, at a party he promised not to host at their apartment, he said "who wants to drink out of mason's baby cup?"

so, it's a sign of what a dumb-ass his soon-to-be ex-wife is, too, that she would marry such a neanderthal. he looks cromagnon, but he acts neanderthal.

that's all for now.

it's time to say goodbye

this saddens me to the core. these jeans have a good history with me, and i with them. yet i think it's time to say goodbye. the hole in the knee is totally across and huge. holes in the knee will forever be a problem--i teach preschool and i'm on my hands and knees and rolling around and sitting with my legs crossed *indian style, etc... plus, now with the baby. i'm really not supposed to wear them to work, but they fit so nicely into my boots, which i wear all winter. is there some way to fix them? i don't care of it looks quirky, but there's gotta be some way to save them. a patch would be too little at this point. i guess i could wear them over tights, but i'm already pushing maximum density in these jeans--i can't possibly fit tights under there. or could i...? i don't even have tights. i need tights. i need to get tights from heather @ the LittleMissMatched store at union station.


* we say "crisscross applesauce" in preschools these days, but i grew up calling it "indian style." i understand the need for change; however, "crisscross applesauce" bugs the shit out of me. now you know something (else) about me you never needed to know...

watching a show about commercials is super difficult...i find it really hard to focus because i feel like the show i'm watching is always on a commercial break, and that's when i start blogging...

i'm missing "the funniest commercials of the year" as we (i) speak (type).

check this out for starters:

should i even post this??

The guy who won Jeopardy! tonight had been trying to get on the show for 16 years--since he was a teen. He kicked ass. Now that's inspiring.

Oh my gods...I am such a nerd!

just give me one more inch

i mean, really! this doesn't look right, especially on you. one more inch would have made all the difference (that's what she said).

in love with eldery twins

OK, so, i pretty much have a crush on Edith and Ellen. you know, the 77 year old twins from the Walgreens commercial. yeah, i want to be pals with them. or adopt them as my grandmothers, since all of mine are gone. as it turns out, their real names are frances and iris, but i'm still hands-down all-in. check this out.



i'm sorry, but in the commercial, don't they appear to both be skinny-minnie? but here we see that "ellen" (iris) is a bit chubbier. they didn't mention that in the commercial! i mean, edith/frances coulda said "i was married first, i had kids first, i got this haircut first, and YOU'RE FAT!" that's what i woulda said if she were my sister, anyway. of course, frances/edith could be suffering from anorexia...? and since they're twins, ellen/iris would also have to have an eating disorder; however, hers is clearly not anorexia...

well, regardless of the name frances, these gals just have to be jewish. and they shoulda been used as one of the couples in When Harry Met Sally, except they're not a couple in that way...

right before...

when taking these photos between 8:15 and 8:30pm on june 14, i had no idea that i would be counting time between contractions by 10. i wasn't "due" for 12 days, whatever that means. i mean, i was "to term," but not "due" for two more weeks. explain that to me. anyway, i wanted the baby early, like the 23rd, so i was not expecting to go into labor for at least a week. so when we realized what was happening, i kinda freaked out. well, i mean, i had to stop myself from hyperventilating and i did get really choked up when we decided to go to the hospital. i guess because i knew that when i came back, everything would be different.

hell, you know what? i was probably in early labor in these pictures. i mean, i tried to take a bath, and i was SO uncomfortable--i couldn't sit down in the tub. i'm sure i was in very early labor. but....The Voice started at 9:00, and i think adam levine just pushed me over the edge. whew. whoa. breathe. anyway, here are the last photos of me pregnant.