Miss Penny Lane

I always tell the girls, never take it seriously.
If ya never take it seriously, ya never get hurt.
Ya never get hurt, ya always have fun...
And if you ever get lonely, just go to the record store and visit your friends.

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

one of my all-time favorites

This is your new thing now
Naked as a rose
Everything exposed
But not quite
This is your new thing now
Cards out on the table
A genius with no label
But not quite, not quite

God, I swear it's good to be back home
Waiting for the newest Rolling Stone
All the other girls are still at war
The best and worst of 1994
Sometimes I see the half and not the whole
Sometimes I see the face and not the soul
Sometimes I think this place has no part
For anyone who ever had a heart

This is your new thing now
And it looks so good in print
Just a poet and her pimps
But not quite
This is your new thing now
A prom dress and a sneer
The woman of the year
But not quite, not quite

Gee, it's good to see a dream come true
People smile and bless all over you
Mixing up those latest junkie-isms
With all the pretty terms of religion
And don't you love the leader of the band
Equal parts Butthead and Peter Pan
All the other kids are sad again
A legend's not a legend 'til it ends

This is your new thing now
And it makes the whole world spin
It's as least as old as sin
But not quite
This is your new thing now
And now you're turning grinning
But maybe no one's listening
And you might lose it all my darling, yes you might

This is your new thing now
And it feels so good to doubt you
I could almost live without you
But not quite

Monday, February 21, 2011

why i hate baby jessica

today is one of those days when gluing thy tushie to the couch would be perfectly acceptable, even by the standards of certain mothers who view that as a depressing and shameful way to spend a day. let's see: federal holiday? check! raining? check! cold? check, check! empty house/ultimate remote control? oh, baby, CHECK! add to this the fact that i am so tired right now and would kill for a nap, and where & with whom better than Oscar the Couch and Stevie the TV? but, of course, there is NOTHING.ON.TV. nothing. it's the baby jessica syndrome. or law. damn her, that baby jessica.

october 14th, 1987. i was a depressed, 16 year old, missing my camp friends and anxiously awaiting our winter break reunion in toronto. it was a gloomy ohio wednesday, and i was solidly settled into Day One of my planned sick-action. it was a pivotal time for Bo & Hope's story line on Days of Our Lives, and i just by that time, my house was empty during the day, with parents at work and siblings at either preschool or college (yeah, i know). some quick background is that i was pretty much forbidden to watch TV growing up. i mean, The Cosby Show here, and a Sunday morning there (pre-cable when there's nothing on beside televangelism anyway). so here i am with the house to myself and the TV! wee hee! i have no idea how i got to know the whole bo & hope thing, but the point is.....there, right then in the middle of something really good going on between Bo & Hope, "we interrupt your program with this breaking news...." and that was it. it was either watch the whole baby jessica thing unfold on TV for FIFTY EIGHT HOURS, or spend those hours in my room gluing more GQ covers to my bedroom wall.

so, screw you, baby jessica. you messed up what could have been...could have been, well, could have been a couple hours of TV that i felt were so important that it was necessary for me to pretend to be sick and stay home from school. so, there....

and, today is one of those days. i'm planted nicely on the couch on the perfect day to do so, so psyched about catching up on whatever daytime TV i never see, and all damn day long, dontcha know, interruptions about egypt. we have 24 HOUR NEWS STATIONS now people. gimme back my ellen, and do it NOW.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Yeah, but...

Sunday, February 13, 2011

more things i can blame on pregnancy, but we all know i woulda done anyway...and sober

4) my inability to figure out this damn puzzle. well, just look at it and tell me how the hell the pieces are all supposed to go? things like this drive me b-a-n-a-n-a-s. and i certainly don't have the patience to deal with that now, for the gods' sake.

5) kicking over my tea cup moments after warning kurt not to do the same.

6) forget that i'm cutting out hearts in the middle of...ahem, cutting out hearts.

Sunday, February 06, 2011

registry headache

i just find it really annoying that the entire infant/baby clothing retail market is divided into boys and girls, with very little regard for those of us who actually want to wait to find out the sex of the baby, but still need stuff to dress the thing in before we can manage to have a post-baby baby shower. i mean, come on people, 30 years ago, did people just buy whatever color they thought would match the baby-to-be? no, of course not, they chose gender-neutral clothing. WHY is that so hard to find at Buy Buy Baby? anything green or yellow is, for some reason, among the organics. i'm gonna love my baby, but we are not going organic on clothing that will only be on the child for hours at a time--that organic shizz is 'spensive! so my baby will be in classic white pretty much across the board. hell, i'd rather have 6 onesies in classic Carter's white than one adorable monkey-covered organic piece in a lovely neutral brown and green pattern. this kid has enough time left in life to be a fashion guru.

wedding registries? oh my god, how much fun are those to create? after the first 5 minutes of "this feels weird to tell people what to buy me," i was off and adding wonderful kitchen accessories and silverware, and furnishings.... wedding registries truly are nothing but a wish list of some necessary, but mostly extraneous, home-use items. bride & groom have thus far lived without those items--they'll be fine without the latest Crate & Barrel stemware.

on the other hand, this baby registry ain' especially for certain down-on-their-financial-luck parents-to-be. without this huge list of items, this baby will not make it past the hospital doors. ok, drama is ensuing. but seriously, it's again a very weird feeling to be choosing the things you want people to buy for you(r baby), but it's much weirder to actually need almost every little thing on this list.

have we counted yet today the many ways in which i am stressed? i always wanted to be pregnant. woot! but i wanted & expected to enjoy a stress-free and happy pregnancy. i'm having a hard time living in the moment when i can just start to see the lights of the train coming into the station...